Episode 30 Strengthening Relationships: 7 Ways Leaders Can Win with Joshua K. McMillion

The Decisive Point of Leadership

Tales of Leadership | Joshua McMillion | Episode 30

In this episode of Tales of Leadership, Joshua McMillion breaks down what he calls the decisive phase of leadership—strengthening relationships. This is the point on the leadership bridge where everything either accelerates or collapses. It’s where authority fades and influence takes over. If you fail to connect with your people, you fail to inspire—and if you fail to inspire, you fail to lead.

Joshua frames leadership not as a title, but as a journey—one built intentionally, phase by phase. And in this third phase, the mission shifts: it’s no longer about proving yourself—it’s about building trust, connection, and alignment with your team while still delivering results.

At the core of this episode is a powerful truth: you are not a leader in the eyes of your team until they choose to see you as one. That choice is earned through how you show up, how you connect, and how you treat others.

The first step in building those relationships starts inward. Joshua emphasizes that before you can connect with others, you must understand yourself. Leaders who lack self-awareness cannot build authentic trust. Through reflection, feedback, and deliberate thinking, leaders begin to identify their values, strengths, and blind spots. You cannot lead others well if you do not first lead yourself well.

From there, he challenges one of the most common leadership myths—the “open door policy.” Joshua argues that saying you’re approachable is not enough. Leaders must actively remove barriers and create environments where people feel safe to speak up. If your team hesitates to approach you, your “open door” is already closed.

Another key insight is the need to move beyond rigid systems and embrace intuition. Leadership is not clean or predictable—it’s messy. While structure has its place, transformational leaders know when to trust their instincts and adapt to the moment. Sometimes the best leadership decision is not found in a manual—but in experience.

Joshua also reinforces the importance of the golden rule—treat others how you want to be treated. Trust is not built overnight; it is cultivated through consistency, discipline, and intentional actions over time. Leaders who rush this process often find themselves isolated, with teams that comply but never truly commit.

A major component of strong relationships is constructive candor—the ability to have honest conversations without destroying trust. Joshua highlights that leaders must care personally while challenging directly. Feedback must be delivered with intention and respect, especially in private. A leader who cannot create a space for honest dialogue will never unlock their team’s full potential.

He also introduces the rule of flexibility, emphasizing that communication must adapt to the individual. Every person processes information differently, and great leaders adjust their approach accordingly. This adaptability creates stronger teams, deeper trust, and more effective execution.

Finally, Joshua brings everything together with the concept of crucible events—intentional moments of stress and challenge designed to forge stronger teams. These events simulate adversity, allowing teams to fail, learn, and grow in controlled environments. Teams that struggle together, grow together.

Final Thoughts

Strengthening relationships is not optional—it is the turning point in leadership. Without trust, connection, and alignment, no level of authority or strategy will produce lasting results. Leadership is about people. And people follow those who invest in them, challenge them, and stand with them through adversity. Build relationships first—everything else follows.

After Action Review (AAR)

  1. Are you intentionally building relationships with your team—or just managing tasks?

  2. What barriers exist between you and your team, and how can you remove them?

  3. How are you creating opportunities for your team to grow through challenge and adversity?


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Joshua K. McMillion

My passion is to help leaders burdened by their increased responsibilities become transformational leaders. For the past 16 years in the military, I have led and helped thousands of men and women achieve professional and personal success. Let me help you achieve your true leadership potential.

https://www.mcmillionleadershipcoaching.com/
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Episode 31 with Jerry St. Pierre

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Episode 29 with Dr. Mike Battaglino